Mayoral candidate Rob McCann is having to stand in for his billboards after a string of targeted attacks have escalated, with members of the public now removing the entire billboards using a circular saw and taking the whole structure away.
“I knew the building material shortage was severe because of global supply chain issues,” said mayoral candidate McCann, “but with only my billboards being removed, it raises some questions as to what terrible quality wood the other candidates must be using.”
Councillor McCann’s billboards have been the target of vandals with an initial wave of spray painting that Mr McCann thought was inspired by the monster in Stranger Things. However, a new wave of vandalism has seen two large 2.4 meter billboards completely removed from the Ōtaki and Waikanae townships after being sawn off close to the ground.
“You have to laugh at people who think this kind of vandalism is going to sway an election result. Our community is strong and proud and I’m certainly not going to back down. My fourteen-year-old son and I put most of my billboards up, and he even took the photo of me. So, to whoever you are, all you’re doing is creating more father-and-son time, and steering another McCann towards public office so our likeness can haunt you for another generation!”
“That said, I’m happy to sit down with the sign jacker, and have a chat and see what their beef is. There’s not much that can’t be solved with a cup of tea and a chat.”
Mayoral Candidate McCann has planned a fundraising movie next Monday evening to top up the bank account. “I hope the screening of ‘Moonage Daydream’ about David Bowie will help pay for disappearing signs and structures which are worth in excess of $250 each. I can only imagine that David Bowie would be suitably outraged that his music is paying for more 2.4 metre wide copies of my mayoral-looking face.”
Tickets are still available for the fundraiser screening at 6 pm on Monday 26 at 6 pm, available for purchase on 04 9725065.
If anyone would like some tree firewood instead of pinching it from candidates, we have some from trees in that were blown over last month — just e-mail us. —Eds