from The Babylon Bee
WASHINGTON, D.C. — What Hunter Biden had initially hoped would be the most wondrous day of his life resulted in profound disappointment, as he discovered the white powder being spread all around the White House grounds was only fake snow for decoration.
“Aw, man!” Hunter was heard saying after spitting out a mouthful of fake snow. “I thought Santa Claus had granted my Christmas wish for all the blow in the world!”
Secret Service agents guarding the presidential residence had reported seeing Hunter dash out from his limousine when it arrived before diving into a pile of white powder and doing snow angels. “I’ve never seen that big of a smile on his face,” said Agent Sean Kellar. “Except for that time he was here to greet that group of Ukrainian escorts.”